Pregnancy & Postpartum

Online therapy for women across New York State

Therapy for every step of the way

Whether you planned your pregnancy or were surprised, this doesn’t feel like the dream of motherhood you were sold. It certainly isn’t what you saw from TV shows and movies and it definitely wasn’t what your friends and family described it to be. Of course, you’ve felt sad before but this time things feel very different:

You didn’t imagine yourself struggling to connect with your pregnancy or baby.

No one told you just how lonely you would feel (because everyone always asks about baby but rarely about mom).

On top of it all, you never expected to feel like a ‘bad mom’.

This doesn’t feel like “the most magical time of your life”

Whether you’re pregnant, recently given birth, or gave birth five years ago, you may be struggling and you deserve relief. Therapy may be for you if:

  • You’re struggling to feel like your old self again despite having a healthy pregnancy or baby

  • Feeling low, anxious, or fearful has become your new normal

  • You’re the first in your friend group or family to have a baby and no one seems to understand your experience

  • Childbirth didn’t go as you imagined and you’re struggling with anger, guilt, and resentment

  • It’s hard to feel excited or joy when thinking about your pregnancy or baby

  • You have visions or dreams about harming yourself or your baby and you aren’t sure why

  • …and more

This isn’t just the ‘Baby Blues’:

Many of my clients came to me because they couldn’t make sense of what was happening to them or why. Why couldn’t they shake this feeling? They tried their best to “fake it” but never actually made it. And even my clients who were privileged with helpful friends, family members, resources, and a caring partner, judged themselves for not fulfilling some unrealistic expectation of parenthood (here’s to you, hyper-curated and ultra-positive social media influencer family accounts). You may be experiencing a perinatal (or postpartum) mood and anxiety disorder (PMAD). Perinatal (during pregnancy and the first four weeks after childbirth) and postpartum (up to one-year post-birth) challenges are more common than you think. In fact, PMAD’s affect roughly 20% of women and up to 70% of Black women and women of color. And it doesn’t stop at perinatal and postpartum anxiety or depression. It also includes bipolar disorder, OCD, PTSD, and psychosis. Get to know the signs and symptoms of each PMAD that I treat.

  • One in five women will experience PPA. PPA can sneak up on you when you least expect it, making you feel on edge about everything from your baby's health and their partner’s wellbeing , to whether you’re a good parent. It's normal to feel anxious about this whole parenting thing, but when it starts to interfere with your daily life or you feel like you're drowning in worry, that's when it's time to reach out for help.

    Symptoms include:

    • Panic attacks

    • Hyperventilation

    • Body aches &pain

    • Excessive worry

    • Racing thoughts

    • Irritability

    • Restless sleep or exhaustion

    • Repeated thoughts or images of scary things happening to the baby

  • PPD is like a sneaky shadow creeping into your life. It hits moms-to-be and seasoned moms with feelings of sadness, guilt, or not feeling good enough. It's shitty, no doubt. Sometimes, you might feel like you're in a sea of overwhelming emotions, and that's okay. You're not alone.

    Symptoms include:

    • Sad mood or crying spells

    • Difficulty bonding with your baby

    • Avoiding family and friends

    • Loss of appetite or eating much more than usual

    • Difficulty sleeping (insomnia) or sleeping too much

    • Overwhelming tiredness

    • Less interest in hobbies

    • irritability and anger

    • Fear that you're not a good mother

    • Hopelessness

    • Feeling worthless, guilty, or inadequate

    • Difficulty thinking clearly or making decisions

    • Thoughts of harming yourself or baby

  • Perinatal and postpartum bipolar disorder is like riding a rollercoaster while juggling flaming torches. It's not just the typical mood swings; it's experiencing very high-highs and really low-lows all while dealing with pregnancy or caring for baby. Sometimes you feel like you're on top of the world and super sure of you self and other times, you're stuck in the darkest pits of despair. You can get out of this cycle. I’ll help you navigate this journey and come out stronger on the other side. Get started by recognizing te symptoms.

    Women with perinatal and postpartum bipolar disorder experience cycles of depression, very similar to PPD (above), and mania.

    Symptoms of mania include:

    • Feeling unusually happy

    • Speaking faster than usual

    • Feeling energized and like you don’t need to sleep

    • Racing thoughts and difficulty concentrating

    • Continuous high energy

    • Feeling overconfident in yourself or abilities (especially in something you’ve never done before)

    • Feeling like you’re a celebrity or powerful being with special abilities that other people don’t have

    • Impulsivity

  • Perinatal and postpartum OCD isn’t nesting - it’s like having a brain that's stuck on repeat and you’re exhausted from hearing the same song. It's not just about wanting things neat and tidy - it's about having intrusive thoughts and compulsions that may have taken over your life during pregnancy or after baby. Perinatal and postpartum OCD can feel like your brain's playing a cruel joke on you, making everyday tasks feel like climbing Mount Everest. Let’s start by recognizing the signs.

    Symptoms include:

    • Experiencing unwanted or upsetting thoughts, images, dreams, or memories related to baby (Obsessions)

    • Feeling anxious or disgusted by the intrusive thoughts

    • Repetitive actions that reduce anxiety related to the intrusive thoughts (compulsions)

    • Fear of being left alone with baby

    • Difficulty resting, sitting still, or sleeping

    • Heightened alertness and preoccupation with protecting baby

    • Avoiding certain activities with your baby like bathing, carrying them up or downstairs, changing their diaper

    Common obsessions women experience include:

    • Hurting baby (or pregnancy) through shaking, dropping, or other means

    • Contaminating (e.g., germs or illness) oneself or baby

    • Losing control and harming others

  • Complications during pregnancy, emergency c-sections, and unexpected stays in the NICU are difficult and can be traumatic. Roughly 10% of women will experience postpartum PTSD and Black women and women of color have the greatest risk of developing it. As someone who wrote the book on Black women’s experience of birth trauma (no, actually), I know the reality of postpartum PTSD all to well.

    Symptoms include:

    • Intrusive re-experiencing of a past traumatic event (which in this case may have been the childbirth itself)

    • Flashbacks or nightmares of the painful experience

    • Feeling hyperaware of yourself and your pregnancy/baby when outside of spaces where you feel most comfortable

    • Avoiding people, places, and things that remind you of your worry thoughts

    • Irritability

    • Blaming yourself or feeling like a bad mom

    • Difficulty sleeping

    • Inability to trust that your baby is safe with other people (including people you know you can trust like a partner or best friend)

    • Feeling Anxious or having panic attacks

    • Feeling disconnected from your body or difficulty recognizing parts of your body

    • Thoughts that the world around you is not real or feels like a dream

Aren’t changes to be expected with pregnancy and after baby?

While there is an expected window of adjustment before and after baby, symptoms that get in the way of living your life may be indicative of a PMAD. For example:

  •  Is getting out of bed or trusting someone else to watch baby so hard that you haven’t showered in a while?

  • Are you struggling to focus at work, making unusual mistakes, or receiving negative feedback/evaluations?

  •  Have you avoided people or places so much that leaving your home is an overwhelming thought?

Ongoing changes, or symptoms, that get in the way of how you typically live life indicate that it’s time to get support. You don’t have to figure it out on your own or have the answer. I can help.

You Don’t Have To Figure It Out On Your Own: Choose Lavender Therapy

My Goal

I know this picture of motherhood wasn’t in your plans. My goal is to support you through the thoughts, feelings, and patterns that have kept you feeling lost and confused throughout your motherhood journey. Let’s reimagine what parenthood could look like when you feel seen, heard, and valued.

My Process

Your unique experiences and perspectives will guide our sessions. Together, we will understand your current needs, establish goals for treatment, and use evidence-based techniques (e.g., CBT and psychodynamic therapy) to address your PMAD.

My Promise

I am committed to providing a compassionate and non-judgmental space for you to express yourself and strive to create a safe and inclusive environment for women of all backgrounds, cultures, and identities.

Invest in you today. Your future self will thank you. Schedule your free 15-minute virtual consultation.