Surviving the Anxiety Riptide: How ACT Therapy Can Transform Your Relationship with Anxiety
Whether you’ve struggled with lifelong feelings of anxiousness or noticed it’s harder to cope with overwhelming thoughts lately, anxiety can feel like a riptide in our lives that is pulling us under. So, what do we do?
Naturally, we see this riptide, or anxiety, as a problem that needs to be solved. We try doggy paddling to the surface while gasping for air in between yelps for help only to find that we are choking and quickly tiring out. In real life, our battle with anxiety may look like burying ourselves in work, avoiding the people and things we love most, or turning to alcohol or substances to avoid distressing thoughts and feelings. So how exactly do we save ourselves from this anxiety riptide? The answer lies in changing our relationship to our anxiety, and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, or ACT (pronounced ‘act’), can help us with this.
As distressing as it can be, anxiety is an emotion just like happiness, sadness, confusion, and anger. However, designs of the human central nervous system, language, and social norms have reinforced the idea that we need to always feel good and if we don’t, this is a problem that needs to be fixed. ACT acknowledges that the more we try to solve, distract, avoid, or numb our anxiety (in the hopes to feel good again), we inevitably feel worse. We may notice that we not only feel more anxious, but angry, frustrated, or depressed as well, because we couldn’t resolve our initial anxiousness.
When we take the first step to changing our relationship with anxiety, we first acknowledge that anxiety is a naturally occurring feeling that we cannot get rid of. In fact, when we start changing our relationship to anxiety using ACT, we quickly notice that it comes and goes on its own just like any other feeling we experience (and research shows that we can experience at least three to four different emotions in a single day). We also realize that we can live more in the present moment and create a life worth living based on our values, even when distressing thoughts or feelings arise. Ultimately in ACT, the goal is not to get rid of anxiety, it is to change our relationship to it.
ACT’s six pillars address how to have a healthier relationship with our anxiety and cultivate a life worth living (even amid an anxiety riptide). These pillars include:
Being Present: Mindfulness; focusing on the here and now without judgment
Self as Context: Understanding that thoughts are thoughts and feelings are feelings and not true reflections of who we are as whole beings.
Defusion: Learning how to notice thoughts without becoming too attached to them.
Values: Reconnecting to the values and principles that are most important to us.
Commitment: Pursuing the things that are most important to us in life, even during difficult situations.
Acceptance: Willingness to let difficult thoughts and feelings enter the mind without trying to solve or change them.
So how do we stay alive in the anxiety riptide according to ACT? John Cena’s character, Ron, said it best in the film Vacation Friends. “I watched so many guys wear themselves out, swimming against the riptide, swimming as hard as they could. They had to be extracted. Me? I found out the trick was... just float.”
If you live in the New York state and are interested in addressing your relationship with anxiety, feel free to contact me today. I am here to support you.
Change Your Relationship With Anxiety in New York, NY
You’re tired of being pulled under by anxiety riptides. I am here to help you ride the wave so that you are in charge of your life again, not your anxiety. Imagine a life where you felt more present and connected to the world around you, even when you feel anxious (and not living in a future that has not happened). I am here to help you get there. Follow the steps below to get started:
Contact me now and start your journey towards managing your relationship with anxiety.
Learn more about my approach here.
Live a life where you feel in control (again).
Other Services I offer Anywhere in New York
In addition to helping women manage their relationships with anxiety, I offer a range of specialized services to support you through various life phases. Whether you need assistance with postpartum and pregnancy concerns, burnout, infertility or pregnancy loss, or family planning therapy, I'm here to guide you every step of the way.
About The Author:
Dr. Ruby Rhoden is a New York-based Licensed Psychologist who is dedicated to uplifting women through life changes and challenges, including reproduction. With a deep understanding of the complexities of burnout, Dr. Ruby provides a safe and supportive space for clients to explore their emotions and develop strategies to overcome exhaustion and regain their zest for life. She understands how unhelpful behavior patterns and mental health disorders uniquely impact women and uses evidence-based techniques to usher in sustainable change and relief. Dr. Ruby is dedicated to helping women develop healthier habits and relationships with themselves and their bodies so that they can connect to others and the world around them again. Dr. Ruby studied at Cornell University and Rutgers, The State University of New Jersey for her Bachelor's and Doctoral degrees, respectively. In her free time, she enjoys watching reality TV, supporting small businesses, and writing blog posts to remind all women that they are not alone.
